Nerves

When I was in the valley this weekend, G and I went to Frenchy's and Storks Landing to check out the baby clothes (I'm a sucker) and I ended up spending almost 50$ on Zoe! I have to slow down with the spending. I've been getting an idea of how freakin' expensive it's going to be for her and I to live sans J and it's very intimidating. I swear if I didn't have my parents' help (thanks for not making pay off my loans this month!) I'd be screwed. I'm also glad that I have a little cash stashed away for such an occasion. Sad, but true.
We move on Saturday and honestly, I wish it was Friday now. I could finish the last of the packing and get my ass moved in NOW. The anticipation of dealing with the first night alone is driving me up the wall. I'm sure I'll cry and feel very overwhelmed. As is I'm fighting nerves every day. Am I making the right decision? Is this really the best for her and I? Are things going to improve with J by being apart? The last is the most important. I want us all together as a family, eventually. Right now is just not the time. Hopefully this blog will give me an outlet aside from harassing my family and friends with my woes. I'm trying to be all grown up about this and frankly, I'm tired of sharing my stress with others. I'm also tiring of their pity. Things aren't that bad, we just didn't want them to get worse. Be supportive, not pitying!